My Son the Cannibal?

Joes Barbell
Comments Off on My Son the Cannibal?
You can’t tell me those are the eyes of a self soother

When you hang out with a baby all day you notice a few things about that baby.  Like everyone who has met him, I also think Mason is handsome, well tempered, and all around a great baby.  But I also get to see his other side.  No he isn’t bad – just weird as hell.  Really!!!  He makes the strangest faces – all day.  Grunts like a deer rooting from fallen acorns.  And, the weirdest thing of all has to be his infatuation with giraffes and warm milk.  Me, when I drank milk (like every other normal person in the world) I liked it best ice cold.  The latest thing he has picked up that freaks me out is this hand eating thing.  Eliza calls it “self soothing” behavior.  Me, I’m wondering what the heck we are going to do when he fits both his fist in that mouth of his and can’t get them out.  I hear all you mommies out there already, “aww, leave him alone he is just trying to suck his thumb.”  NO!!!  This is something else.  I have never seen a baby try to double fist both his FISTS!!!  He goes about this strange behavior with such intensity.  You know my buddy Beatrice Kiddo.  Remember that time she cut the top of Oren’s head off.  That’s the way Mason tries to eat his hands.  Maybe it’s a sign of things to come, but, signs of what?  Worst case, I figure he’ll be a closet Cannibal.  Best case, Mason will probably have a nasty thumb sucking habit.  I am pretty sure the weird stuff will only continue to get weirder.  Heck, I’m his father and I know I’m not the ripest banana in the bunch.  If you already know this please keep your comments to yourself.  I’m often reminded by my family that while I was a youngster I once painted myself mahgony, slept walked often, and refused to wear short sleeves or pants for fear of the wind.  To round things out I grew up to be a middle schooler with a huge crush on Reba Macentire and a high schooler who walked the halls of Neshaminy High School wearing winter gloves and sandals with socks.  In the end I think I turned out ok.  Most likely because no matter how weird I got I was surrounded by people who cared for me and wanted the best for me.  In the end I need to do the same with Mason, hope for the best, and support his journey into self soothing (or self cannibalism?).